The truth is I am in way over my head Secured debt 145k,unsecured 50k . Secured debt and monthly bills now taking 100% of income.(same home 35yrs Assets home about 180k,big truck 15-20k misc tools,rolling stock,10k on a good day.Folks living on a hardship on place in mobile home on property. Cant borrow with derogs on cr and late pmts on secured debt this last year. All cc,s in charge off or collection status... 2 judgements coming to life and 1 tried to attack checking acct. The worst case for immediate conern is wages taken by garnishment ...That leaves ability to pay monthlys in jeopardy. 1 Bk atty said too much equity,mortgage in my name only,excludes family waiver?(close) truck is paid for,and rolling stock could be taken to pay creditors. Dont qualify for bk repayment with income 50k. Trucks are a dead horse with housing slump...If the housing slump deepens into a full blown recession and work again slows down the whole picture changes again. Home value slips, and work could be an issue...but working for now.. How did this happen? High fuel prices eating our trucks income and the inability to pass on these costs in this field of trucking. WE were waiting holding on for someone to come to their sences on these fuel prices. With the truck paid for and in good shape we were going to pay our way out.. Now its not practical and the hope is gone..so many years of trying.. So how do we proceed now? Thank you for your concideration and time..
Help me out here, as I am confused as to your situation. We all would like to help with advice, but I'm not sure what your full picture is. What parts of this financial trouble are "yours", and what parts are potential ID theft? Per your other posts it appeared to be ID theft that was the problem, but your are stating there are other factors impacting your ability to pay your debts. Dividing and conquering looks like it's needed here, to minimize damages. I think we just need a clearer picture of what all the issues are. Good Luck...
Well everyone..this is so hard...yesterday I was looking for bank statements to counter a bill and found 9 months of bills,certified letters,unopened mail that throws every detail I thought was true...Your ealier posts on the other threads were getting pretty close to the truth..I have been deceived from my spouce. Now I have got to attack the problem from a different prospective. This thread is the bare bone truth that I have been digging out from all the smoke screen here at home... From this deception at home I dont know how much ID theft is real... My main concern now is to save my place of 35 years....I will deal with the id theft as it comes up... So far the Id theft is small amounts.. The problem WAS my spouce was paying bills and handling the money when I was trucking as an indepedant owner operator and was taking in 150 k a year. With the housing bust I am now working for wages of 50k a year. She wasnt able to pay our bills and was getting us deeper and deeper but had a large enought cash flow to hide it..Sort of...There have been anomilys that now are fully explained... I do apoligize to this board for the inaccurate former posts...But your insights have caused my situation to clarify everything that was nagging me but could not quite sort out.... Can you imigine having several years of this deception in your life? In our small town our name is to be our bond...And now? I am deeply embarrassed....and deceived... I have cut her off from the money,mail,some phones...Calling atty tommorrow for a agent on my behalf as my word is damaged...to negotiate judgements What would this board recomend? Thank you for your time and patience....
Sorry that this is the truth that you discovered. A slim consolation, you are not the first, nor will you be the last to face this problem. Best is the slow, methodical effort to sort out the whole picture. Only then can you begin to plan how to begin recovery.
Any one that has been decieved in this manner know how difficult this is. The nagging question now is where does the truth begin and where does the lies end.. how far is the deception ?...Just money or more? I believe my approach of digging out is reasonable. A. identify the debts B. plan a coarse of action depending on activity of debt.(2 judgements bearing fruit) contact atty C..reach and contact with agreements with all others D plan all sorts of other ways to accomplish goals. Any other wisdom ,insight ,experience to concider ? Any other stories of success in this senario?
I am also sorry to hear about what you are discovering, at least it starts to make some sense now. It seems you have a good handle on the approach, what you have outlined is a good basic strategy. The only other advice I can offer is: 1) First, find a good place to "vent", get how you feel out of your system. Talk to a friend, family member, the church, a counselor, whoever. 2) Stop your losses: you should open a new checking account, in your name only for now to stop some bleeding. Also, cancel all credit accounts that you may fear will continue this mess. 3) Keep an open mind, and keep focused on the financial/credit items. Obviously you have a lot here, keep yourself focused, and busy, with the tasks at hand. You'll need to address the other emotional and personal items later. 4) Don't judge yet: you'll need to keep communication open with your wife to handle this situation. Perhaps there are reasons for what you've experienced, and perhaps she thought she was doing the best she could. 5) Start digging: you'll need to go through everything and determine what the true damage really is. 6) Use all the resources you can find: your attorney, financial counselors, look to your city's services, you may be surprised what you find available. Don't let pride or shame stand in the way of progress. You've nothing to be ashamed of. Lastly, you're not alone, the board here is filled with good people who like to help, and I'm sure you'll find other support in your personal life. You'll have to walk through this, but you do not have to walk alone.
I have had nagging thoughts for years that wouldnt quite come to the top....Well now we know.. Thank you for your support and understanding..Thank you for the "life line" There are several hard choices in the future...This I can see.... I would speculate some day down the road this experience can help those that follow.. My depest thank you
Yes, this is a mess, and it's going to be a mess for a while as you sort it out and tackle it. Bizwiz gives some very important advice in his #1 point. You need to be able to vent to someone outside. While some of it can be done on a board such as this, there are some things that you just don't want out in public. The church can be a good place to start. There are also many other agencies that give low-cost or free help. Perhaps your pastor can recommend someone. Are there any creditors that you have kept reasonably current? I'm thinking if you go to them and explain the situation honestly, perhaps one or more will work with you to get new accounts that have restrictions that only you can use them. When my sister divorced her first husband, she had several creditors who would make it a "user only" account. They had some kind of code, and when she used the card she had to show ID and often they had to call in. That can be time-consuming and embarrassing, but it might help. The one card I remember for sure was a store card. I don't know if the major companies like Visa and MasterCard do this or not, or if it's still done. But it's worth a try. It may be best for your lawyer to contact them on your behalf. He may have a little more influence. By the way, make sure only you are the attorney's client. If it's an attorney that has represented both you and your wife, you may have to get another attorney because he could now be placed in a conflict of interest situation. So that's another potentially painful conversation that you need to have.
A significant implication of what Hedwig has suggested is that you need an attorney representing your own interests and the marital interests only to the extent that they coincide with yours and/or are represented with your fore knowledge and explicit consent.
The attorney IS the one with the problem if he tries to represent a couple and there is a possible cause of action between the couple. The poster needs to be aware that his attorney could have a potential conflict of interest. While most attorneys will withdraw, there are those who need to be reminded of their conflict.
But the effects of any conflict would be felt by the client. And since the OP is/would be the client, then it is his neck that is on the line.
There is no conflict in this area..She has had a long term atty for her own interests....I will seek legal help in this area of consumer law.and we will work our way thru this legal maze of MY interest.. All I need to do is prioritize the needs ...If there is no fraud on her part she should be ok...(hiding letters is deception..not fraud - yes it is almost as bad-I have worked DA&*%# hard to make this business work..maybe I wasnt the nicest guy that she would rather hide the bills than face me) ( little one told me Santa wasnt coming with my attitude..out of the mouth of babes) In a logical manner...Save the place....Fight or deal on the judgements to prevent loss of income,fight all new dunns with verification..validation.. and get fraud nailed down and refi with any means availible..Get credit reports cleaned up...and work my legal 7o hours a week... other than that piece of cake..Shouldnt take more than a few years...and monitor the economy.... This will effect my strategy..immensely....Home value drops and equity goes away.....Now bk a different option. I still see the 1980 recession all over again....Fuel prices poisoned the economy.. then.....and now? Work was nonexistant... However we will press ahead on this starting am monday... Thanks to all posters and the help..How will I ever repay all of you..
Well here is the latest...Both mortgage loans are under recontruction.(usBank 1 hr on phone waiting)..Game plan is workable...Next have "afro engineered" plan in works to satisfy defaulted loans that are moving thru the courts. The plan has several options and is very flexible. Purpose is to reduce debts on my choosing rather than the ridgid legal system.spreading the wealth thru the "system" (hidden expences etc) . I Can negotitate settlements at a discount to me and better than BK to creditors. Or if they refuse to deal and hold out they are in for a beating. Bottom line is the housing market is slipping and the equity preventing Bk is coming to me. I would rather deal my way out and reduce the dead weight.. plus I will be able to reclaim credit by rebuilding rather than starting over dead in the water..Been busy with C&D letters (nice to slap those culls around..lol) and writing "validation "letters.. and lastly getting new credit reports and fighting ID theft.....other than that not much a going on here.Thanks board....no1
Sounds like you're moving in the right direction, and that you have developed a good game plan. Just keep working it, and hang tough. You'll come through this.
This is troubling. Whom are you writing C & D's too? If you are trying to communicate with creditors to settle these matters, that stops them in their tracks from talking to you. The only way they can communicate with you is thru a summons.
WE are writing them to stop calling....AND DO write us... Isnt that the way we are supposed to do everything ? on paper? You have no idea of the large volume of collection calls "with phone drones" WE are past OC calls and in collection stage of game...And many call are credit ID theft that are reported and they keep a hounding us!!! Interesting fact...every credit card bailed in the same month...
It sounds like what you are sending is a "limited cease and desist." That should work. I think jlynn was worried that you were telling them to cease and desist all contact. That's not good--then the only thing they can do is sue you. Having everything in writing is good and maintains a paper trail.
