lb59, my recently formed perception is hat you respond with whatever flies off the keys, without any consideration for the post itself ... also, I find your use of the "whole quote" feature ,without any, let alone judicious editing, whenever it has no real applicability, to be very annoying. we're to the point now where it's like wrestling with pigs...it's pointless, the pigs like it, and you feel dirty even if you don't actually flail around in the mud with them... I don't like feeling tired and dirty, so I'm done with this exchange and responses to your posts on this thread. Have a good evening,
Re: to Nicole I have watched with interest the comments in this thread regarding child support being paid to a mother of two self supporting adults. Having been on the side of this issue in which I worked for the state collecting child support as well as being a non custodial parent paying the support I wanted to make a few points. First, it goes without saying that if the two are self supporting adults if the non custodial parent is still paying ONGOING support he is doing so because he is too foolish to take action to stop it. If he continues to do so out of lack of effort or out of not being motivated enough to gather the required information to go to court and stop the payments, then he is doing this to himself and deserves what he gets. In only a few states can ongoing child support continue past the age of 19. In most there is a stipulation in the law that support ceases either upon graduation from high school or age 19 whichever comes first. A few states set the age at 18. For support to continue past the age of 19 almost all states require by statute that the "child" be enrolled full time as a college student and that proof of enrollment is available upon request. In this situation support can be required until the age of 23. There are no stipulations that I have ever seen that indicate a full time college student cannot be otherwise self supporting. In many situations such as the one described, where the custodial parent was not utilizing the support to provide for the college student I have seen the actual child for whom support was paid petition the court to have the support paid directly. If mitigating circumstances such as those described prove that the child is not receiving the benefit of the support this motion is almost always granted. If the non-custodial parent is paying "arrearages" for support that was due and not paid the situation is much different. If the arrearages are due to the custodial parent receiving Aid For Dependent Children when the child was a minor, then these arrearage payments are made to the state to reimburse the taxpayers for supporting the children. If the arrearages are being paid directly to the custodial parent for support provided for the children then they are being paid under a court order obtained as a result of the custodial parent seeking support for the children when they were minors. The brief synopsis described in the post indicates the mother is suffering from multiple addictions and did not provide adequately for the children. This would bring question to my mind, if the non custodial parent was aware of this fact when the children were minors, why did he not seek custody to properly care for the children. I cannot imagine any decent, loving parent allowing his or her child to remain in a situation such as this. All other issues aside, a non custodial parent, male or female, has an obligation to support his or her children to adulthood. It is not the solely the obligation of a single parent and certainly not the taxpayers. As they say it takes two to tango. Being negligent in supporting one's children is an abomination in my opinion.
child support Personally, I don't think that child support should be posted on a credit report at all. Essentially, there are no rules regarding how long they can report the information or for fighting what they report. I can see all sides of this story. I can't imagine being a single mom waiting on child support each month- that has to be tough. However, we are on the other side of this fence. Child support order from another country- hubby tried to be involved but she cut him off and threatened to have him arrested if he came into the country where they live. He sent money anyway- she sent back the money and letters. Years later the government where she lives comes after hubby to pay + interest. CA enforces the foreign order and he has no say about it. It is on his credit report and probably will be from now on... there is no way to fight it- THAT STINKS. Point: don't judge someone for their situation until or unless you have walked in their shoes.
Re: child support I fail to see how administering child support in a manner that leads to bankrupting a parent contributes to supporting a child. I also question the validity of the amount they claim he is in arrears. Correct me if I'm wrong but I thought the amount for a support payment was based on the payors income!
Re: to Nicole 1*the alleged arrearages are due to a court order obtained as a result of the custodial parent seeking support for the children when they were minors. 2*The brief synopsis described in the post indicates the mother is suffering from multiple addictions and did not provide adequately for the children. This would bring question to my mind, if the non custodial parent was aware of this fact when the children were minors, why did he not seek custody to properly care for the children. 3* I cannot imagine any decent, loving parent allowing his or her child to remain in a situation such as this. 4* Being negligent in supporting one's children is an abomination in my opinion. Hal ================== =========== 1*So even if this were the case why can't the boys petition and get a court order to have the money paid directly to them? 2* Her alcoholism occurred after the boys became adults. 3* They were never in that situation at that time. 4*The guy has lost 5 homes and a job or 2 and the opportunity to be hired for several jobs due to child support. He has went without food on his table and been left untreated for medical attention. He has lost every thing he had at least once all due to child support. How many non divorced dads have sacrificed all this for their kids? So I would not call him a deadbeat dad.
Re: child support What if the payor has the capacity to make a good income but instead, dives into the sub-economy know as self-employement and only discloses what they want to disclose as income. Sure, there are problems with every system, but the vast majority of people who are in arrears are there because of their own irresponsiblity or any other reason. The bottom line is one parent is paying the school bill, medical bill, rent, food, etc., etc., without having the luxury of paying it or not and another parent may decide that they can pay when they want to. It is a horrible system and no matter what side you are on, the only ones that it is affecting is the kids. I guess if a person has made the decision not to pay, what does it matter if they are driven to bankruptcy? Personally, jail is a better alternative. If the state is going to support your kids because one parent is worthless as a parent, then let the state suppport them as well as a resident of one of the local centers for incarceration.
Re: child support Lost a job due to child support??? How do you do that? Why don't you work a few extra jobs so you don't owe back support in the first place? Don't get me wrong, I am ordered to pay a large amount but that's the amount I've been ordered to pay so I pay because it's the right thing to do, it's the law, and I know I should because I assisted in creating a child. On the other hand, my fiancee has two children that her self-employed, sub-contractor loser is ordered to pay much less than I pay for my one child. It wouldn't be half as bad if he actually paid the amount ordered. This mother has depleted everything she has to make sure her kids have a good education and are safe and well-fed. They both have disabilities (mental). So, since their father doesn't support them, guess who does, the guy who supports his own child to the best of his abilities. I've worked so hard to get this guy arrested and finally have an arrest warrant out for him and I can't wait until he's in lock-up with the rest of the deadbeat losers. The bottom line is, I created my kid, so it is my responsibility for her health and welfare. I love my fiancee's kids, but I did not make them, but it's OK for me to support them while their fine example of a "father" does what he pleases. I don't think this is a good topic to debate. I'm sure there are a few people who get screwed over by this system, but I'm almost sure the percentage is miniscule. Boy, I feel better after that rant
1*in California a request for driver's license suspension may also be processed. 2*In 5 years the majority of reporting I witnessed in regard to child support arrearages contained major errors Hal ========================= 1*this is a real no brainer if I ever heard of one. 2*I beleve this is how the guy I am referring to is getting shafted.
1*my recently formed perception is that you respond with whatever flies off the keys. 2*I find your use of the "whole quote" feature, without any, let alone judicious editing, whenever it has no real applicability, to be very annoying. 3*we're to the point now where it's like wrestling with pigs...it's pointless, the pigs like it, and you feel dirty even if you don't actually flail around in the mud with them... Maggie75 ================================ 1*You have miss read my message(s) somehow in order to come up with this perception 2*To appease all members with the lay out of my post I would have to use hundreds of different formats for my post. Sorry I'm not going to do that. 3*This is the response I usually get when one doesn't have a valid reason to disagree with what I said.
Lost a job due to child support??? How do you do that? kozman . ==================== Like This. He got a job . It lasted for 3 weeks until his employer had to start deducting support payments from his wages so they let him go. People also refused to hire him because of the support issue. Why don't you work a few extra jobs so you don't owe back support in the first place? Pretty hard to get the extra jobs in this situation isn't it?BTY you mean the guy I'm talking about not me don't you?
Of course I mean the guy.....It's mandated in many states that child support be taken out of the paycheck to try and prevent people skipping out on paying. I'd say he would have a cause of action against that employer firing him because the child support agency was taking funds from his pay.
I guess I'm so very different from the rest of the dads in America. If I knew I had to support my children, I would work anywhere and any amount of jobs necessary to support them. They are my responsibility and no one elses. By the way, I'm not sure if Wendy's or McDonalds cares too much about child support issues, but they are paying 8-9 bucks an hour around my area. So, if you work at both, that's 16-18 bucks an hour. Not bad pay in today's world and you just might be able to send some support to the child that you and the other parent brought into this world.
Here is how they got around that : They said they would call him the next time they needed him to come in to work. They never did call him.
I have seen him turned down for job after job in favor of other applicants who weren't nearly as qualified or as experienced as he is. When you see this happening over and over again and again there has to be something wrong with the picture. This guy is anything but a lazy good for nothing loafer. In fact the harder the work and the longer he has to do it the better he likes it. I have never seen anybody else like that. Something is very fishy when a guy like him can't land a job. The only explaination has to be the child support issue.
Well, I guess than your case is the first one I've heard like that. I guess there is an exception to every rule. I'd still be working somewhere, I wouldn't care if it was digging ditches, I'd be digging a crap load of ditches then.
He does have a job now but this went on for about 4 or 5 years. He had to go through hell and high water to get it though. It even cost him 2 fingers off his right hand.
Sorry, wanting to be sympathetic, but I have my child support taken from paycheck every payday. It has never caused me to lose my job and I'm the MOTHER, you'd think that would make it worse! It has been taken out for over 5 years. Look, who cares about the guy, the problem is about the arrearages showing up on the report. 1) You need to make the arrearages show up only once on the report from one state. 2) You need to make really really nice with the caseworker and explain that as soon as you get the arrearages paid off that you would like the item deleted. Yes, they will do this. I have had it done. 3) The caseworker cannot delete the item. You have to pay the arrearages. They can't charge you for something that they have no record of. Ask for all the records from the beginning of the filing to now. Get that part straightened out; speak to the person that is in charge of reporting to the CRAs and have them send out a UDF. I know through personal experience dealing with Washington, Utah, and Oregon, this is how to do it. I do know that in case of overcharge, they will reimburse you. The most important thing to do right now is to establish a relationship with the caseworker. I cannot stress this enough.
Re: child support LB- Support is based on many things, payors income, custodial parent's income, whether the child is in daycare, the age of the child, payor's and custodial parents "necessities". If you have assets, that is considered income, hell a state could even tell someone (who is not paying the court ordered support) to sell their Lexus for a Ford. If this mother was so horrible why didn't the father seek custody? The courts will tell you the mother can spend that money any which way she wants to (or father), as long as the children are properly provided for what does it matter. Put it to you this way, when and IF I get a check it's about $64, that's the average of my electric bill, I use it for that, should I go to jail? Although, when there is no CS check the electric bill still gets paid. Point being, get both sides of the story. As a previous poster mentioned, their are MANY reason why an adult would still be receiving child support, and until he does something about it, theres no room for complaining.
Re: child support ...so you take the DRIVER'S LICENSE away and they can go to WORK...HOW?????? The bus??? 45 min. early or ALWAYS LATE... Walk 7 blocks to work from the bus stop... Gets called into work..."I have to get the bus...I just missed the 8:17 bus, the next one comes @ 9:17 and it takes me 10-20 more min. to walk from the bus stop. FORGET IT!!! I'LL CALL SOMEBODY WITH A CAR!!! Oh I have a car, the state took my license away, because I owe child support... LOSE~~~LOSE
Re: child support You'd be suprised how ineffective this really turned out to be for the average delinquent child support payor. Most would simply drive without a license until it they were stopped. In almost all cases I saw go before the Family Law Judge the license was ordered immediately reinstated for the very reason you brought up. How can he pay if he can't drive to get to work - no job - no money - no ability to pay. The only group of people this really seemed to get a response of immediate payment from were professional drivers such as truckers, cab drivers etc, it was amazing how someone who didn't have a spare dime to pay up found sometimes tens of thousands of dollars stashed away in the mattress to immediately pay their past due support.
