Long story, short version. All vehicles in his name, he allowed her to take Tahoe, but is pushing her to get refinanced yesterday. She has good credit, but bank turned her down today on to high mileage. Besides the thing is a time bomb waiting to happen. No warranty, no one to work on it. Problem, good credit, lower income. What do I advise her. We are pulling scores right now. She is 3000 miles away from home, with no family, and scared. No money to put down on vehicle. Although she can get a cash advance on credit card. Help please, he's escalating to nasty rather quickly.
Just in case of a crunch: or for lack of a better answer.... try peoplefirst.com - they were great to me. I was in a similar situation - my car was in my ex's name and I was given a "deadline" (of a WEEK) to work out financing or he was going to take it, report it stolen, etc. (and to get him off the hook with the loan - he was trying to FORCE me to hurry hurry hurry and finance) NOTE - I had paid a $2K down payment and every payment after religiously and on time. But I digress. I got on this site and they pre-approved me, sent me my paperwork and I went car shopping. No down payment required. I know it's not the best answer - but I was able to walk into dealerships with a little more power since I was a "cash buyer" and got an excellent deal..... I really did my homework on all of the cars too..... So in essence, I called his bluff and he's now stuck with the car and the payments - that he did NOT want..... I parked it in front of his house, dropped the keys in the mailbox, and skipped off on down the road.... Not sure of the consequences since nothing is final yet for your SIL.... but it makes for feeling GREAT! Just another option to keep in mind when she's feeling scared..... Tell her to keep her chin up!
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv She's in Alabama. I'll try the loan option that gargoryle girl gave her. BTW- he gave her the same timeline as for you. 1 week. The house loan is in his name, but supposedly she is on the deed. He expects her to walk away from everything just because he has all of it in his name and he is taking 2 CC with about $3000 total. Any advice is appreciated.
Well...my first bit of advice would be to tell not her to be afraid of him. They are getting divorced...it doesn't really matter what he wants her to do...if there isn't an order in effect or a separation and property agreement, there is nothing saying she has to do anything. If she does not have a good lawyer, I would advise her to get one asap. This is no time to let emotions get in the way of doing what is best for her and her kids if she has any. L
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Alabama is not a CP state...she should get an attorney as soon as possible.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv No kids, thank god. The attorney she contacted told her he wanted $2500 and she can't afford it. The husband is pushing her to just sign off everything because he knows she can't afford attorney. We're trying to get her to fight for her rights, told her that with everything in his name, he can sell any of it right away without a restraining order. BTW- out of spite, he took the truck the other night and moved it to another location, when she called him about it, he just told her that it was probably stolen. Found it in a store parking lot, locked and with the seats and mirrors adjusted to his specs. He said he was just messing with her.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Tell her to call the local bar association and see if there are any free or reduced legal aid offices in the area.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Her concerns: 1. No vehicle to drive (working on that) 2. Long, expensive divorce (he makes a lot more than she does) 3. She doesn't want to be nasty, but feels she maybe should get a little out of their house (owned 2 1/2 yrs) 4. That her credit doesn't get screwed up because of this. My advice to her was this, PLEASE correct me if I am wrong. Have him refi the house (currently at 8%) and cash her out at a fair value. Give him the Tahoe vehicle back, to me it isn't worth the price, plus it has mechanical problems. Make it simple, take the money and run.
Well, she definately needs a lawyer. I was divorced several years ago. The first thing my lawyer said was, "Don't make any big purchases or take on any significant debt." I had an old POS car and was about to buy a new one. His response was, "You can make that last for another couple months." The net is, she shouldn't make any large purchases or take on any significant debt without talking to a lawyer.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv guppas, Thanks, advice taken. But, she either refi's car now, which she was just turned down this morning, because of high mileage, or he takes the car back. It's in his name only.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv When it comes to divorce....It creates a big mess You will need to be very detailed when approaching this.Make sure everything is documented or it will haunt you. First question is ...What is in her name ? What does she want or need? last, Is it possible to come to a agreement on the items with him? This will reduce the cost of the lawyers .. If not both parties will lose .. Lots of lawyer fees An impotant Point... If this person has a big heart... she needs to but that a side and get to business or she will lose ...Hope it works out
Can she qualify for a loan on an inexpensive, reliable used vehicle? Let him have the Tahoe, and the loan that goes with it. Sounds like it's upside-down anyway. Sorry he's being a jerk. If you feel that there is a threat of violence, would a restraining order be appropriate? Best wishes Radi8
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv The only thing in her name is the house, only on the deed. She has a CC or two in her name, the rest are joint. She has called to have his name removed from at least one of them, and they allowed her to do it. The pressing point right now, is the vehicle. She is now living with a roommate, so that helps with bills. I advised to close all CC's that are joint, was I correct in doing this? She has a very big heart and would do almost anything for this guy (has put up with alot of crap from him for 7 years). She's not looking to screw him, just get a little to start over.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv I am in MS and one day I got mad at my hubby and told him I was selling our house b/c the mortgage is in my name. I called a realtor and was told it does not matter if his name was on the mortgage or the deed or anything, that he would have to sign an agreement to sell the house. MS is not a cp state either.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Just have to remember... Until divorce is final everything that he spends she spends... That is why it is not safe for her to buy anything because the court would allow that to be brought into the divorce. She will also need to get a letter from the creditor stating that she owns that account. If not it is just hear say.... She also needs to contact on the creditors and advise them of the issue or it might be possible for him to cause her grief thru the creditors. I see this happen all the time and it is sad
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv I would think that the accounts that they are joint users on, she would need to call and try to get her name removed so that she is not responsible for any future charges??????? I don't know if that can be done, but I know I would not want to be responsible for any FUTURE debt incurred by my ex spouse.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Depending on direct state laws....She is responisble until divorce is final in th e court. Even if her name is not listed.
