Ya Gotta Love the Irish

Discussion in 'General Lounge' started by lbrown59, May 3, 2003.

  1. lbrown59

    lbrown59 Well-Known Member

    Subject: Fwd: Ya Gotta Love the Irish

    >>>Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next

    >>>when his telephone rang.

    >>>"Hello, Mr. Hussein!" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy

    >>>down at the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing to inform

    >>>you that we are officially declaring war on you!"

    >>>"Well, Paddy," Saddam replied, "this is indeed important news! How big is your army?"

    >>>"Right now," said Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there is myself,

    >>>my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Seamus, and the entire dart team

    >>>from the pub. That makes eight!"

    >Saddam paused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have one million men in

    >>>my army waiting to move on my command."

    >>>"Begorra!", said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!" Sure enough, the

    >>>next! day, Paddy called again. "Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We

    >have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"

    >>"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asked.

    >>"Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor."

    >>Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 16,000 tanks and

    >>>14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to

    >1-1/2million since we last spoke."

    >>"Saints preserve us!" said Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you."

    >>Once again, Paddy rang again the next day. "Mr. Hussein, the war is

    >still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified

    >>>Harrigan's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and

    >>>four boys from the Shamrock Pub have joined us as well!"

    >>Saddam was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes.

    >>>My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile

    >>>sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

    >>>"Jesus, Mary and Joseph!", said Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back."

    >>>Sure enough, Paddy called again the next day.

    >>>"Top o' the mornin', Mr. Hussein! I am sorry to tell you that we have

    >>>had to call off the war."

    >>"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

    >>>"Well," said Paddy, "we've all had a long chat over a few pints, and

    >>>decided there's no way we can feed two million prisoners."


    >>>God Bless the Irish!

    >
     

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