My life is totally over. I am recently married (within the past 6 months). I had virtually no debt (less than $20,000 school loan) prior to being married, but my wife has been on disability and now my debt is over $80,000 in credit card debt (99% utilization). I make decent money, but I can't cover the month's bills, even when making the minimum credit card payments. Personally, I haven't spent a dime on frivolous things; however, my significant other has a bit of a shopping problem. Should I file bankruptcy or try to do a debt consolidation (do I even qualify)? What potential options do I have?
Been there done that. Married my wife who is 12 years younger than myself in Age and Financial maturity.. She has horrible credit from CCs and bad spending habits..Luckily its not near as bad as you have it as far as actual debt but I had to basically treat her like a parent would.Slap her hand ever time she tried to reach in the cookie jar..And Oh yea she would stomp and Pout around evertime I put my foot down .But its far better than hearing the phone ring everyday from a CA wanting payment.. From your post you sound like a frugal spender. If so you need to put your foot down and take control. As far as your current situation.Thats a tough decision to make when the amounts that high. I chose not to do BK..If my debt was as yours is I probably would have considered it.. BK is getting harder to do also due to the Govs reform of BK laws.. You,ll have more hoops to jump through.. Plus as you know BK goes on your CR for 10 yrs.. It will also stay with you forever.. Can you transfer some of your higher interest rate card balances to ones with better rates?..
Part of my situation is that I have lived on my own for many years, so I know what it takes to pay rent, pay bills on time, make deadlines, and do whatever it takes to keep things from being late. Basically, I have known for a long time to live within my means. In all honesty, before this year, I never knew what a cash advance or overdraft was. Because my wife has always lived at home and had many things handed to her, her spending habits are horrible, but now that we're up against the wall, her habits have been getting a little better. If I can keep from having to cover her bad checks after she writes them (that where much of the debt comes from) I will be fine. Regarding the balance transfer, I tried that a while ago. It works great when you leave the higher interest rate cards alone, but with my high utilization across the board that option will not work.
are you aware of the new BK laws? they require mandatory counseling 6 months b4 you can file and another counseling sesssion before conclusion , I also hear that its a reorganization that you must repay your debt in a payment plan instead of a full discharge have you though of talking to a lawyer about your situation? I would think making responsible arrangments yourself will help you avoid the nasty 10 year negative sentence you would incur on your credit report. there is alot to learn from this site, I would seek legal counsel.
First of all, I know it sounds terrible, but cut your wife off. Take her off your credit cards, and take away the checkbook, since that seems to be her problem. Take her off the account, close her account if necessary. Set up a shopping "date" where you go with her--either to the stores or online. Help her learn the difference between needs and wants. Perhaps if you can get her under control, you can pay it off. If you're a member of a credit union, go explain the situation to them and see if they'll give you a loan at a decent rate to pay off the other stuff. But before you do that, she HAS to be under control or you'll have the same situation again and still have the loan to pay off.
The wall only gets steeper the deeper the hole you dig yourself into. Compounding works both ways. She may need to operate on a cash basis: no cash, no buy. In addition, you may need to formally write up a budget, and track all expenditures, to try to teach her what you can really afford.
My advice to you is: 1) You need to write down a spending plan. Put every necessity down first and go from there. 2) you and your new wife need to sit down and discuss you debt situation. Make her away that this is unacceptable. Show her where the money goes and that there is nothing extra for frivolities while she is on disability. 3)Her cc's and check book must be put somewhere out of her reach. Cash only! 4) Call your creditors. They may have programs that would help someone in your situation. Explain that your wife recently went on disability and are there any economic hardship programs. 5)Your life is not over. You will be able to dig yourself out little by little. Don't do a BK it may haunt you forever. Hope I helped. Sincerely in Christ, leesac Eph2:8,9
