Help! Major Family Problem.

You've paid rent on this car long enough.

Cancel your insurance, let him pick the car up and let him deal with the credit repercussions of a repo if he can't pay the note any longer. Make sure you have no legal liability to VW Finance on this car. Are you on the lease at all?

Today's market is a buyers market and you can easily get a car of your own through dealer financing. Just take $1000 and be prepared to scale down to a cheaper car than a VW. You can get a good deal, even with bad credit.

Your step dad is evil for doing this to you. He's bluffing you with fear that you are stuck with his car offer. But you aren't. Stop playing his game.

 

marci's advice is good assuming that you've told marci the whole story. Sometimes family histories can be tangled messes. Believe me, I know from experience. For example, somebody owes a relative money, and then they borrow more, and then there's an attempt to collect the first debt while collecting the second, mixed with resentment regarding the first round, etc.

Irrespective of your stepdad's motives, and we can't possibly know them first-hand since he can't speak for himself here (and all we know is that you think he is "mean"), I can give you this advice:

This is a perfect example of why it's often a terrible idea to ask a family member to be a co-signer for anything. Even more important is the corollary: think twice and then think a third time before agreeing to co-sign for someone else. Finally, and this is the biggest lesson of all: If you don't get along with certain family members, or if you don't like them (you mentioned that you can't stand your stepfather), then by all means don't involve them in any financial transaction. These are tough lessons to learn, but it's amazing how some people will repeat them even after being burned. It's my hope that you'll not engage this man in any further financial entanglements, no matter who's in the wrong here, for the simple reason that you do not like him.

Doc

 

Possession is 9/10'ths of the law, and he has possession of the title in his name. If he takes possession of the car, your battle will probably be futile.

However, It also sounds to me like you two had an oral contract, namely you'de pay him the monthly payment, you'de use his good credit, and you would drive the car. I don't know if he was agreeable to this arrangement gratituosly, or if he expected something in consideration for his part of the bargain? On question I have, since this was a lease, is: did your oral agreement extend only to the lease, or did it also extend to the option to buy? You've obtained the benefit of driving the vehicle for the last four years, in exchange for your $300 per month lease payment. It's not like he screwed you out of the lease.

Is your name on the lease at all, or is it entirely in his name? Is anyone else aware of your agreement?

The best option, from what I know at this point, is to get your wife to talk some sense to her father. It sounds to me like you have a real need for the vehicle.

 

Sorry. I see that you wrote "stepfather," not "father-in-law." Forget the advice about getting your wife to talk some sense to the man.

 

Can you get copies of all your checks paid to VW credit and take him to small claims? Since all you really want is the paperwork, maybe this would be an option. I would talk to a lawyer and see what your options might be.

 

I frankly don't think litigation, courtrooms, and lawyers are the best tools to use when attempting to tease apart contentious family interactions. It strikes me that those should be the options of last resort. Perhaps the first person who needs to hear more about this disagreement would be your mom. As his wife, she's co-making any agreement with you regarding this vehicle and will have some say (and hopefully some sway as well) regarding the outcome.

Doc

 

Randy,

I admit to projecting a bit in this situation. My own (first) step-father was a sadistic b*stard who beat the hell out of me and my mom, threatened convincingly on several occasions to take us out of this world, and ran all kinds of financial scams on us. Our family was rich, but he forced us to live like paupers in some control fantasy he had. So, I know what it feels like to be taken advantage of financially by a father figure and this story just pushed all the wrong buttons.

I know that there are two sides to every story and somewhere in between lies the truth. But I still think that if a person is financially involved in something - that all the related financial paperwork should be readily available to all parties involved.


Calmest_LA:

You have my empathy and prayers for a positive outcome. Move your mom out of that situation - if she'll go. My mom - thank Jesus - had the good sense to leave of her own volition.

 

Doc-
Based on what I've read, I've got to disagree with you here, sorry.
I am a HUGE fan of Judge Judy, Judge Joe Brown, People's Court (you get the drift). I like to think I've learned something at the end of each show.
IF he decides to bring him to court he has the burden of proof, 9 times out of 10 ORAL contract are null and void, however by your step-father accepting your checks (provided you wrote them to him and not the loan company) then that in itself maybe a written contract, it will also help if YOU maintain the insurance on the vehicle and it's insured for your address NOT the step-fathers.
So bringing him to court is always an option. Your other option is to tell him to screw and go get your own vehicle.
My moral of this is: The best way to lose friends or anger family is to borrow money from them.

 

I always CMA!! I love my mother very much and trust her with my life, but when I was paying for a car that I was driving in her name, every month I made out the check to her with a memo: GMAC acct # XXXXXXXX pymt # X.

I still do this today, even when paying my hubby for my new Durango (in his name) make it out to him and put that memo notation on it.

I will NEVER be "screwed" over financially again like I have been done in the past.

 

This is interesting. Have you been making payments directly to him or to vw? And have you been making them by check? (do you have proof you've been making the payments?)

also, do you have the letter stating
"My step-father he had the balloon payment re-financed, again through Volkswagon credit, then he wrote me and told me that I had to continue making the $300.00/mo. car note for another two and a half years!"?

 

could you get a small car loan now, use the car as collateral, and pay the guy off and get the car?

could you qualify now?

If so, try to propose that you pay him in full now... and ask him what's the payoff... maybe you could do it nicely at a family function (where he'd still want to look good). I agree, you have every right to get the real payoff and not get ripped off by him...

but at this point you've paid the car off almost anyway. A lump sum is always cheaper than the financed amount... If you have the letter that states he'd turn the car over to you at x time... then at least you have something in writing.

As for paying for the lease, leases are cheap ways to get a car... and if you paid more then chalk it up to experience and call it a day.

But try to salvage the car out of this. You've paid for it...

 

do you think he'll give you the car at the end of the payments?

and while I may agree that you're getting screwed, at this point, as long as the car is turned over to you... can you buy a car of similar quality for the amount remaining on the car?

and if you walk away, is he getting a nice paid for car?

 

I think this is a critical question. She has no legal claim to the car and an oral contract will be very tough to hold up in court. So, in many ways, I think she is at the mercy of his motives.

If this guy is abusive and using this to leverage control in the family - there is no reason for him to hold up his end of the bargain, as he would them relinquish control over her once he handed the car over.

Therefore, my suggestion to let him have the car and "cut the losses" is with the idea in mind that it is better to just extricate herself from a power relationship with this man by any means possible, even if it means taking a loss on the car. Some things just ain't worth dealing with a (violent) fool.


I think this is all a control issue, not governed by logic or goodwill on his part.


Btw - Christi is absolutely right on memo'ing checks to everyone, family included. Did you do that, Calmest_LA? If so, that may strengthen your case if you do choose to deal with this in small claims for a breach of oral contract.


Whatever you do - I wish you the best. I undestand your not wanting to take a loss. If you choose to buy a new car, take a good friend with you who knows how to handle business. Find a church member or college dorm mate who can help you.

 

I like Doc's advice concerning getting your mom involved.

If that doesn't work, if you really want the car, I don't think small claims court is a bad option, assuming you have a witness to the agreement, as well as some of the things other members have suggested such as copies of cancelled checks (your bank can help you out there) and proof of insurance. It certainly doesn't seem to be in dispute that you've had the car in your possession for the last five or so years.

If he doesn't dispute the oral contract (knowing you have witnesses to the agreement as well as some documentation in the form of cancelled checks), perhaps your proper course of action would be to petition the court to issue an injunction ordering your stepfather to furnish the paperwork to you. I don't know if a small claims court could issue such an injunction, but a regular court of law certainly could. However, unless you feel comfortable doing the legal work on your own, the cost of hiring a lawyer would probably come close to the cost of obtaining your objective.

You have a good command of the english language and are able to articulate yourself well, so perhaps you could handle the matter on your own. Who knows, your stepfather may even cave in once he is served with the petition for injunction. If he doesn't, and if you're able to obtain the injunction, you should be able to ascertain whether you owe anything on the car. If you don't owe anything else, petition the court for another injunction ordering your stepfather to deliver title of the vehicle to you.

He may allege that there was no consideratin for the oral agreement, and hence, no contract. However, you seem to have provided this forum with allegations of his consideration (i.e. obtaining the favor of the family as well as the possibility of your mom's helping out with his daughter's education). In any case, since you've paid him faithfully thus far, the court probably wouldn't buy his argument, lest he be unjustly enriched.