Homeowner Association Hell!!!!!!!!

What an interesting thread. My sister is going through HOA troubles as we speak. She lives across the street from the Pres. of the HOA. We call them Ma and Pa Kettle. That is EXACTLY who they look like. The woman sits out front in her Mu-Mu, he sits there in his white tank/t-shirt. If she likes certain people, she turns her head the other way and doesn't enforce rules, but if she doesn't like you, she talks about you and your property at the HOA meetings. My sister is a single, highly paid professional and she is rarely ever home because of her hours. The hoosiers around her park multiple vehicles, semi-cabs and go-karts in their driveways. On July 4th they bring their brood and they light bonfires in their driveways and shoot off fireworks, which twice have lodged in my sister's roof and siding and caused damage because the houses are so close together. The hoosier kids sled on the green grass down either side of my sister's house to where now there is just dirt. She loved that house, she had it built just for her. It was her very first house. These houses are in the 6-figure range. She wants the heck out of there. People keep stealing her for-sale signs and they take her garden ornamentation out of her garden when she is at work and throw it all over her yard which looks horrible to a potential buyer. What a nightmare. All I can say is, when we had a discussion about HOAs in my political science class in college, it was all about how you looked at the situation. Is the glass half empty or half full? You can live somewhere with no rules and people will put a couch on their front porch, paint their house an obnoxious color, maybe even store junk in their yard and multiple broken down, rusted vehicles. In this situation, you have complete freedom in regards to your home, yes, but so does everyone else and you are at the mercy of the choices of your neighbors, which could inevitably affect your house value and your ability to then sell it and get the heck out of dodge. Or, you can live somewhere where there is rules on you, yes, but there are rules on the people around you. In the end I've felt that the rules protect you and your quality of living more than infringing on it. Just an opinion, which are just like noses, everybody's got one. That's just mine.

 

You have to attend the meetings to be a "part" of it. Its the same when facing collection agencies, You have to get into their face just like they get into yours. Stand up and fight the battle. If you see Ma and Pa Kettle sitting out in their Moomoo, Complain about it, ITS GROSS!. I don't want to wake up from a nap and see that! I would bitch and moan just like the rest of them.

I would fine their ass and make everyones life a miserable hell just like they made mine.

 

Moved up to North Idaho from Santa Cruz in 1988 for the same reason. President of the homeowners association said we couldn't have a small picnic by the pool. Glad to have left it behind.

Jeff

 

Hey.. you know my neighbors!! <g> There is actually a house down the road from me that is purple with green and yellow trim. I kid you not. Ya need sunglasses when you drive by it. We make fun of it but I'm sure there was some reason the people chose to paint it that color - although I have a suspicion that it was left over paint they found during clean-up week.....<g> Oh well... I guess when they give someone directions to their house, no one ever lands up at the wrong address.

Ozzy.

 

Sal,

The best way to beat an HOA is to beat them at their own game. I've been there, done that. Start going to the HOA meetings to gather information. Find out what exactly they're suppose to be doing with all the money they collect. Then scour the neighborhood with a fine tooth comb to find ALL the itmes they have fialed to take care of, especaiily common areas w/ potential dangers. Then start citing your own viloations at the homeowners meetings.

As for your neighbor, the bitch, I would get the biggest wind chimes that I could find, then I would take pictures of everbody elses chimes to show that you aren't violating any rules.

Accuse her of setting off your alarm and misusing her power as chairperson of the HOA. Start gathering eveidence that shows she's mismanaging her duties.

She must not have anything better to do, so I would give her something to keep her preoccupied. Send in a change of address notice for her and have her mail redirected. Order porno magazines in her name but have them delivered to another member of the HOA. Make her life a living hell. She needs to develop some compassion, patiences, and tolerance. Take her ass down a peg or two. Play dirty.

Calmest_LA (I"m the calmest one in my family)

 

Ya know, I was gonna stay out of this but I must confess - My wife and 2 kids were evicted 6 years ago from an HOA because 'my neighbors thought I was aloof". Can you freakin believe it!

When I went to the board of directors (a$$holes) they told me that I should show my face more often because people didn't really like me because they never saw me and didn't trust me.

Well, SORRY! Working 60-70 hours a week for IBM as a computer engineer kinda has that effect!

So when my trial period was up and the board solicited my neighbors' feedback about my family and I, they alleged that nobody liked me and so they had to reject me. Honestly, I really think they were just upset becasue I beat their local credit union for $19K when I filed for bankruptcy - couldn't prove it though.

Needless to say, it threw my life outta whack for a few years but did force me to finally get my MCSE certification and begin my ascent to where I am today (literally tripled my income in that time).

I swore that paybacks are a bitch and once my new home is built, I will send a picture of it to my former neighbors along with a thank you note. And when the day comes when I trip over a cracked sidewalk in their neighborhood (my in-laws still live there) and sprain my ankle (or break it or my back becomes sore because of the fall, or any of the NUMEROUS injuries I might sustain) you better believe I will have my vengeance.

 

You couldn't have said it better!

 

Yes they can tow your car.

My parents owned a Condo and you would not believe the crap the association could do. Someone vandalized my dad's truck and while waiting for the police to show up, the condo president came over and gave my dad 1 hr to repair the truck or have it towed as it was an 'eyesore'. If not, the fine was $100 for every hour the vehicle sat there in disrepair. Dear old dad went to jail for beating the pi** out of the guy.

They were having electrical brown outs so my mom hung the laundry outside instead of using the dryer. Makes sense does it not? She got a $500 fine for that. ( They had a no clothes line clause but come on in certain situations rules can be broken )

The neighborhood next to mine does not allow you to park in your driveway UNLESS you are loading or unloading. Your garage door must be closed at all times unless you are entering or leaving the garage. No clothes lines, satelitte dishes, decks, chainlink fences, hot tubs, sheds, hedges. Shall I go on? Who the hell would want to live there?

 

I have never owned a house but I wanted to contribute a story about a friend of mine who managed to get out of an apartment lease. He wanted to leave for whatever reason. The apartment management people would not let him out of his lease. He went to the store a purchased a half case of beer. He got drunk and had great fun putting divots in the grass that belonged to the apartment complex with a motorcycle he owned at the time. The next day the people at the apartment complex said they would be happy to let him out of his lease.

 

I'm in the process of purchasing a home and I got a copy of the HOA Rules. It's 2 or 3 pages, pretty simple.

They have "block captains" that represent the block so everyone on the street doesn't have to show up.

I didn't see anything weird in it, but the one thing that DID strike me as odd was they have a limit to the number of pets you can have...in your own home. The limit is 2 domestic animals - no exotic pets.

I agree with whoever said they are supposed to help and protect your property values...not infrige on your rights. What's the alternative?

I'll tell you...when I bought my first house, by the time I'd moved in, the house next to mine was vacant and the kids two doors down would stand on the side of the house and smoke marijuana, kick in the windows. They'd play basketball in that backyard and if the ball came into my yard, they'd jump the fence and freely roam my yard. They messed with my dog, eventually broke into the house and house other neighborhood kids running through the house playing hide and seek.

When I moved, I couldn't sell my house...because of the dilapidated house next door (among other reasons) and it went into foreclosure because I wouldn't pay for it and my apartment too. But even if I could, I wouldn't have gotten what I paid for it.

It was an eye soar, a fire hazard and a saftey hazard. No one gave a flip. I couldn't even open my windows for fear marijuana smoke would get in my house.

I'm not wishing for "lifeless" neighbors to monitor my life or dictate what I can and can't do, but it sure would have been nice to have SOME type of organization to protect MY home value when those people abandoned that property next to me.

 

There was an X files episode about this very subject.

 

Submitting color schemes to HOA? Give them a little grief. Keep submitting color schemes that you know are loud and tacky (you can start with neon green with neon pink trim!) Don't submit a decent color scheme until you are good and ready to paint your house.

In line with the "religious ritual" annoyance plan, go for not only for weird noises, but odors. Neighbors can get pretty annoyed with giant patchouli incense sticks burning in your backyard.
HOA have a rule against that?

-ingenue

 

You don't necessarily have to live in a HOA neighborhood to have a nice looking neighborhood.

You may not be able to do anything about the color of someone's house, but many municipalities have ordinances that are geared toward "eyesore control". For example, in the neighborhood where I grew up, you'd get a warning that you'd be ticketed if you didn't clean up your eyesore.

My dad had this problem because he was a single dad working electrical construction jobs. No time to take care of the house. Knee and back problems, etc. He got warned about painting our backyard shed, re-doing the driveway paving, and perhaps a few other maintenance items. These things actually *were* getting to be eyesores.

We also have an ordinance that your garbage cans can't be stored in your front yard.

My point is, you don't need an HOA to take your money and tell you what to do, just to live in a nice neighborhood. Find a neighborhood that doesn't have an HOA, and is nice *anyway*, and you'll probably be okay.

FYI, one house in my neighborhood had a painting of the pink panther on each of the double garage doors. It was actually pretty cool. Much more appealing than the houses with olive green or rust red aluminum siding.

-ingenue

 

You are so right Sal.

My friends purchased a home last year despite my warning. Then went on vaction for a week, the had a one car garage in which they kept their running jeep, it was just be restored and almost complete. Before they left the put her car in the garage and the jeep in the driveway, they came back had 2 notices, one for their lawn and one about the jeep!!!!!!

You should never let anyone dictate what you can and can not do in your own home and in your own backyard, no matter what the circumstances!! And as you said, you can find a nice neighborhood.

We have several ordinances here and all the homes are kept nice, and I don't have to pay a dime and don't need Mr and Mrs approvals and restrictions.

 

FYI, one house in my neighborhood had a painting of the pink panther on each of the double garage doors. It was actually pretty cool. Much more appealing than the houses with olive green or rust red aluminum siding.

-ingenue
My Cousins next door neighbor has a a picture of the delta queen painted across their garage door.
They live in a nice residential section of town .

 

Sal,

You really need to get involved at the meetings, You need to complain about her. She smells of preperation H or something. ANYTHING. No-one is perfect. They have to prove it was your car. Can you disconnect the f*cking alarm? I would. IF the cops come, then you can take them there and show them the alarm isn't even hooked up and then go beat on the bitches door and have her arrested for having you woked up in the middle of the night.

Don't be a puss.