A friend of mine just found out his ex wife has opened accounts using their 2 daughters SSN#'s but not their names (she actually used her real name). He called the CRA's today to find out what exactly was on them and the woman was VERY rude. Now the ex-wife had filed for a new custody hearing a few months back (the father/my friend has custody), their court date is Tuesday. NO ONE will help him and everyone he has talked to just gives him a new number to call. The kids are only 6 and 8, but the judge showed A LOT of sympathy towards her at their pretrial, and he's afraid of losing the kids. My state is a very PRO-OVARY state, they more than usual favor the mother. He is an outstanding father, but she is playing the innocent victim mother. I am trying to help him as best he can. I told him to press criminal charges, but at this point I'm not sure he has the proof to back it up. All the creditors would tell him is that yes it is your daughter(s) SSN#, but it's in (ex-wifes) name. What should he do? ANY comments are greatly appreciated!
I sympathize with your friend, because I went through the same thing with my 2 girls and I live in "the Bible belt". Tell him to try www.freeadvice.com and scroll to the child custody forum. There may also be a fathers helpline in your state. They are usually a non-profit/donation only help group. Charlie
It has always been my opinion that when you REALLY can't afford to lose or get wrong/bad advice, I would recommend consulting competent counsel (and with the custody status at risk this is definitely ONE of those times). My advice: Tell him to seek the advice of a really good and trusted attorney (I know its an dichotomy "good and trusted attorney" But they are out there. -Peace, Dave
Certainly applying for credit in your child's name is a crime by statute. Many people with less than good credit sometimes choose that road, of course, but it's still illegal. And, of course, it could be damaging to the child if the child reaches adulthood and the parent has managed to screw up the kid's credit as well. This is easily fixed, though, with a birth certificate, a Social Security Card, etc., but the child has to know about it in order to fix it, so it can be very troubling. On the other hand, is it really in the child's best interest for someone to encourage the parent's criminal prosecution? In this case, the children have already been through what is apparently a horrible divorce and all the hellish interpersonal nightmares that are part and parcel of non-amicable splits. Will the kids now be served for their father to seek criminal prosecution for the mother? (Of course, I could list the possible scenarios that could result, none of them very helpful for the children.) I'm all for sticking up for a friend. I'm all for taking sides and supporting the best parent. I think it's useful to draw the line at a certain point, though. Unless the mother poses a clear and present danger -- especially where physical and sexual abuse come into play -- then I certainly would not advise the father to pursue criminal penalties for his children's mother. I certainly do not advocate using children to obtain credit. On the other hand, the credit industry as a whole can definitely drive some people to desperation, especially those who don't know how to manipulate it. Perhaps a better intervention would be to advise the mother to come join us here on Creditnet, and she can begin to set things right in a way that will not risk heavy fines or jailtime. Yes, we've seen guilty parents crawl out of that terrible scenario here before. Doc
Thank you everyone! Doc- I know I didn't give the full list of details, frankly I was still shocked that she did do this, I always new she was capable. I suggested criminal charges due to the fact that this woman (for lack of a better word) has had him falsley arrested twice, both occasions he had the same judge and the SECOND time the judge told her to find something better to do with her time. (she has weekend visitations and she's suppose to have the kids back by 5 pm Sundays and she decided to keep them later and not tell anyone, so when he got a call from her he yelled at her, so she runs and presses charges. This woman has had 5 children by 4 different men, and has signed over all parental rights of the other 3 because she was denied custody and didn't want to pay child support. Dave- He has had several court hearings on this in the past year, this is the final hearing. The first hearing he HAD a lawyer and the judge was extremely tough on him. The second & third hearings he had NO attorney and the judge kissed his feet, so he thinks having an attorney is making him look bad (I wouldn't be surprised, same thing happened to my hubby). Again, Thank you all for the advice!
Kellie, that is outrageous, one should never be penalized for seeking competent counsel. HOWEVER, if he does feel that he would be penalized by bringing the atty to the court...fine have him go to court alone...BUT BEFORE THE COURT DATE he needs to SEEK ADVICE of competent counsel to fully understand the ramifications (both legally and to understand how the situation could affect his visitation/custody rights and his Xwife/children's lives as Doc went into above) for each and every possible future step, BEFORE he steps foot into the next courtroom. His next move(s) could be extremely dangerous. The judge can not penalize him for seeking advice. -Peace, Dave
I think if you could get proof that she's using the kid's social security numbers to obtain credit, it'd make a great argument in court. One could argue 1. that she's trying to get the kids to be her child-support cash-cows (since she's already using them (illegally) to get money for herself) 2. She's financially irresponsible (obviously her credit is bad or she'd use her own SSN) 3. A bad role model 4. She acts in her own best interests in direct conflict with the children's best interests. Secondly, if the creditors know she's using false SSNs (belonging to minors), and aren't doing anything to fix it, they can get in big time trouble. See if he can pressure them into cooperating by threatening to involve the authorities. In court, it could be a brownie point for him to mention that he hasn't pursued prosecution against the ex for her criminal activity. -ingenue
Also, if he's in a state that only requires one party's consent for recording phone calls, by all means get him to tap and record all his phone conversations with her and the applicable creditors. -ingenue
Was there a GAL appointed? Usually whomever the GAL thinks the kids should live with is where they end up. The best possible advice you could give this guy would be to visit http://www.childcustody.net and read everything there and then read it again. This attorney is out of Michigan, but he has provided the best blueprint of child custody issues anywhere! L
Re: False Arrest The appearance of a crime today is treated as such by the courts. A casual friend of mine got into a verbal argument with a person and left a threatening message on his answering machine. Three months passed when the police came by his house to interview him on a stalking charge. The person who had been threatened conjured up phony facts to make himself appear a victim, going as far as saying his car was broken into, more than 900 annoyance phone calls were made to his house, plus other unsubstantiated statements. He was charged for making threating phone calls because the grievousness of the crime was tinted to the irrational. The crime was classified as a minor misdemeanor and the fine was $250, no jail time. He pleaded no contest.
He also needs to put a stop to this abuse by calling each creditor and each CRA and asking to speak with their fraud unit. He should then explain that the children's SSN has been abused by a third party. This should get her credit cards revoked and the children's credit files protected by a fraud alert. BTW, Experian allows one to place a fraud alert online. Check their online fraud center. Saar
