Well, I don't know where to start. I know that people have problems and that the situation doesn't stay the same but it seems that mine is never going to get any better. Here goes... My husband has been laid off since the 1st of October. We had our 2nd child the following month. He can't get hired to wash cars it seems. We both have BAs, his is in psychology and mine in spanish. Since then, he has gone on to get his CCNA and CCNP and failed his CCIE once. He can do most anything with computers but isn't a good programmer. For you non-techies, he's going up the cisco certification ladder for networking, trying to get a better job. He has been looking for a new job since January 2001 and hasn't been able to get an interview. All of the headhunters have no leads. We have changed his resume several times. He's even applied for jobs that just say clerical and he can't get in. It's either overqualified or 7 years experience isn't enough. We are looking in WI and IL for a job and nothing has come up. We have called everyone we know for help in job leads and nothing has come up. We have tried to get assistance from the government because we can only afford to spend $20/week on food for 4. Sometimes, we can't do that. They say that we make too much from unemployment. The small timeframe in which before we received help, they are making us pay it back. After all of the essential bills are paid, we have about $100 for food and gas and whatever else but they say that's too much cash. Needless to say, this has taken a toll on my mental health. My marriage is the same great relationship it's always been but I feel near the edge. Each day I wonder should I walk in front of a bus and hope the family gets an insurance check or should I rob a gas station. As far as my holding a job, my back gives me constant pain and I have a huge hernia which prevents me from eating alot of things. I tried to get SS but they said that it really doesn't hurt that bad and denied my claim. Of course, I was told that they deny 99% of all claims the first time and 90% the 2nd time. These complications are due to my 2 children being born. Right now our bank account is negative and the next unemployment check is going to clear that up leaving about $50 because I can't have it charged off. That is the kiss of death. I don't sleep very well at night. Usually I stay up to 2am and get up 5am to nurse my daughter then I'm up for the rest of the day until 2am. The credit situation is better than when I started but it won't last if I can't make payments on the car note and such. Thank goodness the CC is only $150 limit!!!! I know this is really off the topic of credit and I apologize if my venting irritates anyone or if this is the improper place to do it. I really don't know what to do; I am living in poverty. I don't see the situation getting any better any time soon. Anyway, thanks for listening to me. Hopefully my sad mood will dissipate soon.
Hi Milkmom. I'm so sorry to read of your situation. Things are truly bad all over. Where is your main source of income coming from? Unemployment? Have you ever thought of starting an at home business such as Tupperware or something along those lines? I have a friend that makes an extra $400 a month by just holding two parties a month...Just a thought. Do you belong to any organizations such as church or social groups? They are great during times such as these and can perhaps lead you in the right direction. I will put you in my prayers.
milkmom, the union diva hates to recommend this, but has he tried a temp service.... it won't pay much, but it will get him in the door. you guys are in northern il, right. there are some places hiring that i know of, but probably not what he is looking for, but i will email you info. i know how you feel, my dh has been unemployed for about a year now also. his field is manufacturing..... talk about the economy.. any way..please take care of yourself... i know too well how emotional stress can affect your physical health. I also know of someone you can call who may know of programs in your area that can assist you w/o worrying about income. i hope your email is on.
MM, I have some pretty good contacts in Chic. and Milwaukee if your husband is looking for a Network Admin type of job. My email is on if you are interested. Whenever things get really bad, just look at your kids and remember that's all that matters. I lost a child three years ago, and my wife has had two miscarraiges since. Whenever things get too overwhelming, I grab my 4 year old son, head out to the swingset and forget about things. There is nothing in the world like spending time with your children. It really puts everything in perspective.
Yes, he and I both have tried and they say they don't have anything but send them a resume for their files. Yes, please!! Any help and/or job leads would be wonderful. Yes, my email is on. Thank you again.
Yes, that is exactly the type of work he is looking for. But he will take anything right about now. In the past year, he has had 2 chances to get an interview but he didn't get the call. Otherwise, nothing. I am emailing you now. You are right about my kids keeping me going. My daughter is giving me the biggest toothless smile on the face of this earth. She makes me forget the hard times we are going through. Sometimes I forget my kids can do that...
Just a thought...or two... first, I am so sorry to hear of your situation...that is so tough and my thoughts are with you! Please don't run with terror at this thought..but it occurred to me that teaching might be an alternate. Alternative certification is always available and might just suit the bill. I know...it was just a thought...but as a teacher I see so many do it this way..and there are positions in the school district out of the classroom for those with the talents you describe! Best of luck!
Yes, our main income is from unemployment. My husband tries to do some consulting work but it's nothing we can count on. We talked about doing a home business but we can't find the money to start one that we want.
Hi Milkmom, Has your husband tried applying at any of the local mental health hospitals, clinics, or at-risk programs for youth? His degree in psychology might qualify him as a counselor or psychological technician. There is also Elance.com. He might be able to get a project or two online, but they do require a monthly fee to bid on the projects. He would be paying the fee to bid on the projects without any guarantee of work. What about Substitute Teaching part-time? if he could sub 3 days per week, then he could use the other two days to job hunt. I have several friends who always fall back on substitute teaching when they're between jobs. When I used to live in Houston, they paid $26,000 per year for substitutes who agreed to sub for only 4 days per week. I know it's not much money in the bigger scheme of things, but I'm thinking it would be ideal for your husband since it would still give him time to look for something else. I will keep thinking! Good luck... Calmest_LA
Thank you for the great ideas. Yes, we have looked into using his degree but everyone wants a master's degree with very low pay, like the low 20s. I can talk to him about the substitute thing and see what the requirements are and what it pays here. I think that our teachers here are on strike but not sure if it has ended or not. Thanks again for your ideas.
sorry for your situation, glad you have the board and a place to vent, off topic or not. wish I knew someone in your area, I'd call 'em in a heartbeat, try to get some rest
I am going to go to bed before it hits 2am. Ok, myabe not tonight but tomorrow I will!! Thanks for "listening" to me.
As far as starting your own business, try an SBA loan. These loans are insured by the gov so banks are more willing to approve them. I think the credit criteria is a little more lenient than most lender requirements. As far as I know they will lend money for a start up business as long as you have a decent business plan. This situation your in might be a blessing in disguise, this might be the start of actually aquiring financial freedom by doing your own thing. I have faced much adversity in my life, losing jobs, being at dead end jobs, etc. I finally got into the mortgage business as a loan officer and now I own a mortgage banking firm. All of this with out a dime in my pocket to start with. Be strong, it will all work out. May God bless you and your family.
I think you are right about this being a blessing. Going through the hard times makes me cherish the good and soso times even more. I don't think I could get a loan with the scores that I have. There are still some collections that need to be taken care of. We have looked into every way to try and use our education and experience but are coming up empty in regards to short term solutions.
UPDATE ______________ The bank sent a letter saying that they are closing the bank account and may report to chex systems. Well, there went my hope out of the window. The account has only been negative since the middle of last week. They have made so much money off of us and we have been a customer for years. All of a sudden they close the account and we are going to cure the balance on saturday. Oh well, at least we have another account. I am frantically calling them trying to get them not to close it but we will see...
Keep your head up! Everyone here has given you great advice....follow it! See what the bank has to say...if they don't want to work with you, GO OUT AND OPEN UP 2 OTHER ACCOUNTS ASAP before they report to Chexsystems. I know that sucks but what can you do? Same b.s. happend to me. My ex did some shady stuff and overdrew our account by $1K with no way of paying it back. I ran to the credit union before they reported. I've been happy ever since and will be off of Chexs in October. The only thing Chexs has done is stop me from opening up an account w/ AMEX Membership Banking. That's it. I've been fine the last 5 years while doing my time. You may be going through tough times now but be glad you have EACHOTHER. That is the most important. When I went through tough times, it was me and my 2 kids and that's it. I had no help from anyone. I worked THREE JOBS just to make ends meat and STILL was running about -$500/mo (due to daycare) thus resulting in a hefty credit card debt with FUSA. I never saw my kids for FIVE MONTHS! I went from job 1 (8-5pm M-F) to job 2 (6-10pm M-F) to job 3 (8-5pm Sat and Sun). I coached volleyball on the weekends so my kids went with me but during the week they stayed home by themselves. They were quite little at the time (9 and 3) but luckily my oldest was a mature for his age and luckily I worked 2 minutes away. My diet consisted of coffee and coco. I had no choice but I did what I had to do and after 5 months of living in absolute poverty (I was one skinny mofo!) I got a breakthrough and landed a great job making great money to the point where I quit the night job but kept the weekend job and was able to afford daycare for my little ones on the weekend when I needed it. I look back on those days and crack up...then I get all choked up. But that taught me a lot about myself. Please believe in your family. It will get better. Children are the greatest source of motivation known to man. It has been my experience that during these trying times, you can't be afraid of loosing it all. That fear will push you to the edge. Always remember that, if you had it once...you can always get it back! I've learned that lesson time and time again. "Rebuild* was my middle name for a while. I've lost so much in my life, but I've gotten it all back 10 fold. As long as you have eachother, nothing else really matters. I don't consider myself to be a great motivational speaker but I hope these words help. Stay strong!
