Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Uhmmm...if he makes so much more than her, it is certainly possible that she can request that he pay a portion of her attorney fees. That happens a LOT up here. The Bar Association has a Lawyer Referral Service called The Modest Means Program. Often attorneys will accept cases for less than their regular fee. Up here, the cost is $40.00 for the consultation and then the atty sends that on to the Bar Association. Its a good deal. A couple of the attorneys in my office participate. While she thinks she cannot afford the fee, in the long run, she cannot afford NOT to pay an attorney. She should be able to find someone to take it with a retainer of maybe $500 to $750. She really, truly needs to do this, even if she has to ask friends and/or family to help her. He is going to take her to the cleaners otherwise. Tell her not to sign anything over to him nor should she sign anything unless it has been looked at by an attorney. L
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Whyspers is 110% right - I used a similar service in TX once. Knowledge is power. At least meet with an attorney, and get familiar with Alabama laws. From one of those who "didn't want to be nasty for the sake of the kiddo". I firmly believe there are two things in life where people will show their true colors. Divorce and Estate matters. 1. Get all the CC's that he has access to out of her name 2. Hand him the keys to the 5 gallons to the mile Tahoe, and get something affordable. Does she have a family member in a position to purchase the car in their name until after divorce is final? 3. Don't let him cheat her out of equity in the house. She has been around for 7 years? That is her blood, sweat and tears in that house as well. 4. She is going to need some thick skin for the near future. And finally "this too shall pass" My thoughts are with her.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Whyspers is 110% right - I used a similar service in TX once. Knowledge is power. At least meet with an attorney, and get familiar with Alabama laws. From one of those who "didn't want to be nasty for the sake of the kiddo".(Believe me the jerk knows this and will use it to his advantage) I firmly believe there are two things in life where people will show their true colors. Divorce and Estate matters. 1. Get all the CC's that he has access to out of her name 2. Hand him the keys to the 5 gallons to the mile Tahoe, and get something affordable. Does she have a family member in a position to purchase the car in their name until after divorce is final? 3. Don't let him cheat her out of equity in the house. She has been around for 7 years? That is her blood, sweat and tears in that house as well. 4. She is going to need some thick skin for the near future. And finally "this too shall pass" My thoughts are with her.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv The guy sounds like a jerk, she needs to forget about being missus nice guy and go for his nards... Get a lawyer, a good one, and make him pay for it. She should be able to get alimony if he supports her now... A good lawyer makes all the difference in cases like these. she needs to lose her heart for a while or she'll lose her ass.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv Hey all, Thanks so much for your advice. I emailed her this thread, maybe it will help. She is going to see a lawyer on Thursday and I think that maybe she is finally through with all the crap. Please keep her in your thoughts and prayers.
just to clarify - peoplefirst is like a lending tree. if she applies, she'll receive offers to choose from (this means more than one inquiry if she's concerned with such things). I was skeptical about using them, but the whole process was smoother than any other financing I've ever gotten. I was in a position where I didn't have a dime for a down payment either..... I would DEFINITELY dump the Tahoe on him - buh bye!! She needs to talk to a lawyer and find out the logistics of buying a vehicle before she makes a move, though. He might tell her she can do it if the right things are in place...
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv She's going to dump the Tahoe back on him, she went just to look at cars yesterday. Not going to do anything until after the lawyer on Thursday. I stressed to her the importance of inquiries and that she should be sure of what she wants without applying to a bunch of places. Hopefully this will be over for her soon, as painlessly as possible.
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv if at all possible - DO NOT go with financing from the dealerships!! they jimmy the numbers so much, you don't know what you're really paying - they play with percentages and payments and make it look like you're not getting screwed..... The truth is they don't even kiss you first...!!
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv I agree gargoyle, my dh is a wholesaler and does the appraisals on trade ins for new car dealerships. If you all remember my post the week before last about being turned down by FMC I was trying to buy an Expidition fm a new car dealership. It was a 00' we were given a price of 21k which for a newdealership is actually very good, BUT I went with hubby last week to an auction and we bid on the EXACT same truck with the exception the milelage (which does make a difference but not this much) and the truck went for 12500. If possible maybe she can find a wholesaler. Like my dh when he sales a car, he is not trying to make a killing on it. The way a wholesaler thinks is this 'the more I sale, the more money in my pocket, the way to sale more, is sale cheaper.'
Re: Sisterinlaw getting divorce,adv tnobles - did you get your truck?? This is why I posted about peoplefirst, lending tree - I think Roadloans.com is another one. I got pre-approved for a $ limit and went shopping for something in my price range. They just gave me a check. I used a loan calculator to determine *my* limit to keep my payments where I needed them. I didn't use the full amount I was approved for. I took a notebook with me, wrote down all of the specs - location, yr, make, model, mileage, price, etc.... I also asked EVERY dealership for CARFAX reports on EVERY car I looked at (if they're not willing to give you one, there's something wrong and MOVE ON.....) I then went to edmunds.com and the kelly blue book site (kbb.com?) and came up with trade in values and True Market Values on all of the cars. I made my decision on one I REALLY liked and walked in completely informed - well, as informed as *I* could possibly get - and made a very low offer, knowing I'd only let them play me to $X and then I'd walk. It never even got that far LOL Sorry, MaBear - this has turned into a vehicle/financing thread...... Tell your SIL with a little legwork and time she can get herself a good deal/good vehicle.... there's a light at the end of the tunnel....
