hi all, i need some important help and advise. before my questions i'd like to give you a little low down on my situation. the night of april 12th my husband came home and politely informed me he had started divorce proceedings. trying to keep this short i wont go into what happened next but i have finally calmed down and now looking for work the last 2 weeks decided there was no way i could make it with a 6yr old,a 4yr old and my mother who has cancer on a cashier or customer service wage. i have decided to go to school. i have chosen the medical field, either medical lab tech or ultrasound tech. now i know nothing about school and i know here we have dentists,dr's and various others who have spent tons of time in school and though i have taken 3 IQ test's and the scores ranged from 136 to 140 which i was told were decent i have no idea what an associates degree is nor a bs. that is one question. another is do you need credit to get student loans? can you get extra money to live on? after your school helps with grants can you still get student loans? when do you pay the money back? do you pay back now or later? basically guys if anyone here can help me learn how to get through school please give me all i need to know. i will be ever so grateful.thank you, kelly
Sorry to hear the bad news... An associates is a a 2 year degree, a BS (bachelors degree) is considerd a 4 year degree, MA? master = 6 years, PHD doctorates=8 years... All times are what it would take if you were follow a schools generic plan and take about 12 to 15 hours worth of classes a semester i thinkie... you can get any degree faster by going to summer scool and the mini sessions in winter that most schools offer... I applied for a student loan when i was 18 and i recieved it as part pell grant and part something else.. sorry cant remember... it was not hard for me to get with the only negative information being a credit card with late payments... that hardest thing for me to get the loan was that i was 18 and had to be declared independent so i would not have to use my parents income for the application.. if you over 24 i believe you are considers independent but again sorry dont remember the exact age
Ok i just got home and check on my student loan... i though i got it from a bank but its from afsa(www.afsa.com)... have you looked into the stanford loan or pell grants?.... you can also visit www.fafsa.ed.gov and look up some info their...
They dont use just a simple age test anymore to see if you are independant. It's a multitude of conditions you must pass. Sounds like she would qualify. If your school participates in the Direct Loan program then credit is not an issue.... unless you are in default on prior loans. IQ test dont mean crap in the world of higher education. Any idiot with fortitude can get a degree. Are you disciplined to study? If you are you can make it. Also take your spouse to the bank in the divorce... why not everyone else does. -Fin
I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. Look out for yourself and particularly your kids though. Also, you might want to ask for alimony for a set period of time to help cover expenses while you are getting your education. If he hasn't filed for the divorce, I would hightale it to an attorney and file first if I were you and also ask for attorney fees. Depending on your situation, you might want to have a freeze put on any checking and savings accounts so they won't be wiped out. Write to all of the companies you do business with (ie phone company, electric co, etc.) and let them know you will no longer be responsible for any of his bills. If your husband has a 401K, you may be entitled to half depending on how long you have been married. Ditto if he owns stock in anything. I learned a lot from my hubby's ex wife. When I got divorced, I just wanted out and took zip, zero, nada. When my hubby's wife got divorced, she made sure her kid was taken care of all the way through college and didn't do so bad herself in the deal. Think with your head and not your heart. Its a very emotional time, but the choices you make now will determine a lot of things in your future and the futures of your children. These are only my own humble opinions and what I would do if I were going through a divorce. Live and learn. And last but not least...you should be very proud of yourself for going back to school and getting an education rather than trying to survive on middle age jobs. L
To expand on Fat Jake's last sentence- protect your family. Make sure you get every nickel you can in child support and be sure the kids are on his health insurance. Cancel any joint cc accounts that have no balance. Try and make sure any cc debt that is divided is carried on a card that is owned by the individual doing the paying. If that isn't possible, and he is responsible for bills on a joint account, get the divorce decree to call that spousal support. You can't bk court ordered child or spousal support. Good luck!
As soon as possible you should make an appointment with a financial aid counselor at your prospective school. If you have never been to school, then you should be elgible for the maximum in pell grant, supplemental federal opportunity grant, whatever other grant programs your state offers, and federal loans. With your income situation, you should get enough to grants and loans to help pay for your expenses for school and living. Make sure that you inform financial aid of your situation and that you need lots of help to get started with school. If you have never had financial aid, then it may take a little time to get your financial aid through but once you complete the first steps, subsequent semesters will be like clockwork. Some schools even offer emergency loans or vouchers to get books and supplies based on what you are eligible for. Don't forget to ask about that. Someone else gave you the website address to fill out your fafsa. Get that done ASAP because they say that pell grant money runs out. I don't know if that is true but better safe than sorry. Hope this helps.
Since I will be finishing my last year of undergrad. next year and going on to law school, I will give you the low down. First you must apply and be accepted into a institution of higher learning. Some schools may require a SAT score, others a TASP Test (Texas), and others may declare you an untraditional student, depending on how long you have been out of school. Second, on the issue of financial aid. You must first complete your taxes for the previous year. This will assist you in feeling out your FAFSA, or Free Application for Federal Student Aid. Once, you have completed this form, the Department of Education will send a SAR, Student Aid Report, to the schools you are applying to. The SAR will indicate your expected family contribution. Based on your situation, it may be $0. Then your school will put together a grant or aid package. This package will consist of grants, the institution feels that you may need for your education. There are need based grants and various other grants dependant on your status etc. Also there are various scholarships available. These scholarships can be either need based or merit based. Last but not least is the student loans. There are various types of student loans out there. I always try to stick with the ones issued by the government. They have the Stafford subsidized loans, in which the government pays the interest on the loans until you graduate or stop attending school. Then six months after graduation you pick up the tab. Then there are the Stafford unsubisized loans. The interest acrues while you are still in school. You can pay on your loans at any time, but repayment begins as stated above. Here is a link for Federal Stafford Loans: http://www.salliemae.com/apply/borrowing/stafford.html You are able to borrow more than you need at some institutionals. This can relieve the stress of being a full time student and working. Good Luck, if you need anything else, please let me know.
thank you all for the sites to review, i have been surfing them all day and have desided to wait until it quiets down here and write everything down i'd like to know. as for the divorce thank you for your kindness and suggestions but it is too late for i have been semi reemed and there wasnt much i could do about it. apparently my jerk had been doing some strategic maneuvering for about a year. as i said he hit me with this the night of april 12 and by the 15th i was served. the original paper work had him getting everything and to my suprise the house and car were missing. come to find out, the house is now, and apparently has been for some time in his parents names. i was never on it but he and his parents were. his name was removed over 9 months ago and his father added to the car a year ago when it was refinanced. we have never had credit together and though we had 1 bank account in both names we also have seperate accounts. he had my name removed from the joint account last month. in arizona this is all legal! az has NO fault divorce laws so your lawyer is for you to talk to his and come to some type of agreement on who gets what. his parents gave some lawyer 5000.00 and said get started, they know i cant afford that so i had to use pretty much blackmail on my jerk. his parents are EVERYTHING to him. they have had their hand in our whole life together 11 yrs. but they dont know their little boy like i do and he knew that. since he had a lame excuse for putting his father on our car i started saving "stuff", little tid bits of character damage here and there and BOY did it come in handy!! like i said at first he asked for everything including my children, but in the end i let it go as joint custody with me as primary caregiver, $500.00 a month child support + $100.00 a for 1 yr because i paid all final utility bills a $3000.00 settlement no to seek spousal support, i can take anything i want from the house (from spoons to beds) and i will claim both children on all future tax returns(he wanted $500.00 a year back for that one) but his lawyer would not add that for some reason. so anyway considering my money situation at present and what could have happened i am satisfied for now. i can still go to court later and modify the child support i think, i hope! i am just greateful th have my boys i would have literally died had he taken them from me all the money in the world would not have changed that. yesterday i was served default papers and i guess in 10 days they will be filed and about a week after that it will be offical.i move into an apt 6/1 so i am spinning from how fast this is happening! anyway i'm sure this way more than you wanted to know so i think i will go back to the student loan sites and learn. thanks again for the help and get ready cause i'll be back for round 2 of questioning! kelly
Stand strong!!! Don't let that SOB ruin your new life!! It's a shame that he had to hide the fact that he wanted a divorce. I am sending you a double dose of extra STRENGTH to get through these rough times. Keep your chin up and good luck!
I don't think what you agreed to is protecting your interests enough. $500 a month in child support is not enough if you now have no house to live in and no car to drive in. An adult suddenly on their own can get by temporarily by moving into a sh*tshack and taking the bus, but it is impossible with children, much less multiple children. $4200 is a very small amount of starter money for a single parent with (as yet) limited career skills. It also seems that you've made a career as a housewife. I don't mean to insult you by this. I mean to point out that you've missed opportunities for career and pay increases over time, for the sake of your marriage/children, and now you have to start from scratch. That's not meant as an insult, either. I mean that while your husband has been building his career, your role in the marriage has prevented you from even starting one. Your role in the marriage - housewife and caregiver - gave him even more freedom to pursue career and give himself a better life. Clearly he's doing well enough if he's got a house and a car worth screwing you out of. You're continuing to do him a favor by being the primary caregiver for the children. Children are a joy in themselves, but the commitment to their care will slow down your progress in education and career. Meanwhile, you've let him off light and unencumbered. You SHOULD pursue alimony in this case. It is your back wages for years of hard work - you should come out of it with some kind of nest egg. P.S. The lawyer wouldn't add the $500 a year for the children because when you claim the children on your taxes, it's because they're living with you. Lawyers aren't always honest, but they're in deep caca if they ignore the law. -ingenue
FYI, many universities have family housing which typically costs much less to rent than the going rate in a given area. You may want to look into it. Also, try to find some single/divorced mother support groups in your area, pronto. Local women can give you a lot of insight (and hindsight) if their own ex-husbands have screwed them over. -ingenue
